Elegant Endurance

So far we’ve talked about a legacy project starting with an idea and as it takes on mass, it grows. Included in that growth is a definition of the roles and processes it takes to become a reality so the project can unfold smoothly, deliver its benefits and then others can carry it on without your direct involvement. In that way …

Great Legacies Are Enduring. The project takes shape and each aspect of it is developed with an identifiable and replicable method – a system that others can learn, teach to many others and have any important course corrections along the way. Your legacy begins to take on a life of its own.

Part of the process is to build a network around you.  Others who are moved by your project want to be involved, ususally in a very collaborative way too. From there, it can develop exponentially. The money needed to build it appears, either because you can contribute it or because funding is available from others – or both. Professional services needed to expand the project are identified (and may even be contributed).

The other people who show up to help operate it and carry it on will also allow you to let go. You can step away, knowing it will continue as designed, to accomplish its defined mission and create a benefit for the intended recipients that can last for many future generations. 

Templates, and tons of existing resources, exist to help you create your legacy. Starting with only your passion, your good and beneficial idea can be developed using time-tested structures and methods that allow you to get it started, involve others in a systematic way, stay involved as long as you like and then step aside to allow it to continue to make a positive enduring difference in the world.

Add the following to your Legacy Notebook under “Element 12 – Enduring”:

  • Is there a template out there – another individual and/or their existing organization or business operation – that is doing the sort of thing you’d like your project to do?
  • Or is there someone else or an organization that’s doing something completely different, but whose process could be applied to get the sort of results you’d like to bring about?
  • Write down the ones that come to mind, and as you notice more, jot them down here, too.

Here’s to your best life…
Cheers!

Dolly and Eliza

Height of Career? Time to Get Busy For Love …

Whether at the end of one successful career or in the middle of your third career, the reward is to really get busy with what you love – making the sort of contribution that working merely to create earned income doesn’t allow.  Making that sort of career transition isn’t always easy…

http://www.abajournal.com/weekly/former_paul_weiss_lawyer_is_busy_giving_away_money

Giving away money is only one way to do it - but it’s not about the money.  It’s about the effort and expending it realizes something money can’t buy.  It’s an experience available to all successful business owners and professionals. 

Our media likes to tell the stories of the ‘big splash’ with lots of dollar signs, but there are plenty of others waiting to be created … and told.

Legacy In Story

Remember last year’s Clint Eastwood movie, Gran Torino?  It is a story about the clash of deeply held cultures and beliefs, and about the common values of life that unite us all.  The story itself is one of legacy, as is Mr. Eastwood’s lifetime of work.

For whatever else it depicts, Gran Torino focuses in on how we impact others, how we are called upon to create that impact, whether or not we respond to the call, and what we leave behind to benefit them (that is uniquely ours to give) when we discover and feel called to give it.  The story is as powerful an example of legacy in development as any I can think of.  I wasn’t so crazy about the ending, but for purposes of the movie, it fit.

I was especially moved by an excerpt from the lyrics of the title song:

Your world
Is nothing more
Than all
The tiny things
You’ve left
Behind

So tenderly
Your story is
Nothing more
Than what you see
Or
What you’ve done
Or will become
Standing strong
Do you belong
In your skin
Just wondering

And I am wondering the same.  Do you belong in your skin?  Are you comfortable there?  Are you truly exercising your unique gifts and giving back from there to make the world, your little corner of it, a better place?

We have each been endowed with gifts and talents that we are especially good at, that may well be easy for us, and even enjoyable – that can also benefit others. Will you tap into the pure joy and personal meaning that comes with doing what’s easy and enjoyable for you … for others? It doesn’t take hard work to help others, just good work – the kind you’re ready and willing to do.  Will you grow into and become those attributes and consciously leave behind those tiny things that you can, or maybe even something more? Are you contributing to life in the ways only you are able?

Start by recognizing today all you are good at and all you are grateful for … then build from there.

What Legacy Is Your Life?

We’re often asked when the notion of legacy first came to us.  Dolly certainly learned the term while studying the law of estates and trusts, an offshoot of the law of property.  Working in medicine for so many years, I thought much of legacy was about healthy living during a lifetime and being in service. Both of us thought legacy always seemed like so much more than a person’s real and personal property, land, buildings, money, watches, jewelry, art collections, farm equipment, etc., etc. …

When Dolly was practicing law in Austin, Texas, she was often appointed as attorney ad litem in probate cases to represent and protect the rights of the unknown heirs of a person who died “intestate” – without a will.  Such people either didn’t know about writing a will or must have felt that they didn’t own enough property it.

Note to self:  if you are reading this now, you probably own enough property to warrant writing a will.  If you have a computer, you quite likely have a checking account, maybe even a savings and some investment accounts and credit cards.  You may also have other things that are legally titled in your name like vehicles and a house or some land.  Your heirs, the people entitled to that property by law at your death, will have to go through a whole lotta rigamarole in court, known as a probate proceeding, to be able to do anything with the stuff that is in your name if you don’t leave written instructions in a will.  Once the will gets proven up as legal in court (probated), it can be “administered” and things can be handled and distributed according to your wishes under court supervision. (Preferably leave instructions in a trust document that allows you to avoid the court proceedings for the most part, so things can be handled privately — and hire a good lawyer to help with all this because this blog post is probably as far from legal advice as you can get).

But I digress from Dolly’s original thoughts and message …

Back to the unknown heirs.  Dolly never intended to practice probate or estate law.  On top of that, she was now in the position of practicing law where her clients were people no one was sure existed or could find.  So her first task was to find her clients. Then the property to be distributed under the law of intestate succession (who gets what when there is no will) – often a home and/or a vehicle or two – could be given to the people who were expecting to get it.

Occasionally she would actually find some long lost relative. Often is was a child born from a relationship the deceased had that no one (often including the child) knew about – a half-sibling to the heirs who got to meet through this strange courtroom process – so the property could be divided up and distributed properly.

Even in cases where there was not much property, Dolly tells me she remembers being  so surprised during the investigation by how the deceased person was remembered.  Often, it was quite fondly for some small act of kindness they had done, a contribution they had made in the way they participated in their community, something they had built, or even some small but pertinent piece of advice and support they’d given along the way.  It wasn’t about their stuff.  That was the least of it – and yet, what this whole probate process was making the biggest deal about.

In every case, someone was remembered for something beyond their worldly goods.  They were remembered for who they were — what their life was really about.

All this started Dolly wondering how amazing the world might be if people consciously thought about who they are and what contribution they have to make to others.  What if they sized up their own strengths, talents and gifts, and consciously decided to make a positive difference, to seek to be remembered for good rather than for purposes of fame or power? 

The unique assets of each person, which might well include their property, could be used to benefit others, and they would get to hear about how they’d made a difference and be appreciated for it during their lifetime.  In turn, that gift of thanks would create a real sense of joy and fulfillment that would produce a self-perpetuating desire to do more, because it feels good not because there is some remuneration or vast dollar amount in it.  Hmmm, can you just hear John Lennon’s song ‘Imagine’ playing in the background …

Thinking about legacy as your life, rather than your stuff, seems to us to be the larger notion of what a legacy truly is.

*How would you be engaged in life differently from that perspective?
*What would you start doing or stop doing or become involved in right now?
*Who would you reach out to? What are you waiting for?

Interesting food for thought.  What say you about your life and your legacy?

Cheers!  Dolly and Eliza

The Who and The What of Legacy

The term legacy most often generates thoughts of “what.”  Some tangible thing produced and left behind.  I agree that some form of asset or artifact can be very much a part of your legacy.  But more important is the “who” behind the “what.”  That’s what makes the “what” what it is!

To me, legacy is about equal parts of “beingness” and “doingness.”  What is unique about you – who and what you love, what bothers and delights you? What are your “IVANMAERS”?

The term is an abbreviation for your interests, values, abilities, natural style, motivations, activities, environments, realities and stressors.  Can you begin to clearly identify these aspects of yourself?

Knowing what they are allows you to fully appreciate your individual gifts – the ones only you can contribute in your individual way, based on the unique design of your DNA and your life circumstances.  It makes you a true power to rekon with – not in the “win, kill and conquer” sense, but in the magnificent ability to “do” that only you possess.

“A bird sings not because it has an answer, but because it has a song.”
– Chinese proverb

From that perspective, there is no competition, there is only you and what you came here capable of doing.  Will you discover yourself and do it?

Legacy is Becoming A New Trend

Used to be when I used the word legacy, people cocked their heads to one side like a curious puppy hearing a new command for the first time. Huh?

It gives me great joy to see the concept out from under the wraps of heads of state and philanthropists with enormous financial estates. While these folks may or may not create great legacies, it seems more and more people are stopping to consider what their lives really mean, and what difference it will make for them having been on this planet. And, oh boy, that’s where it starts.

I read a great post by a guy named Chris Guillebeau in Seattle, Washington, USA. Chris has a great take on his own legacy and his post inspired the comments of a great number of kindred legacy spirits including me. If you’re interested in these notions, you may well find it a great read too!  I couldn’t have said better what he did if I’d written it myself, and I swear I didn’t hire him to write about it. These notions of giving back and social entrepreneurship are springing up spontaneously all over the place. I am so glad to see the trend forming.

I am struck how common the concept of creating a legacy project seems to be among Gen X, Gen Y and the Millennials – even more than it is with people often of considerably greater financial means in the Boomer and beyond generations. There is a legion of humans developing on this planet with a penchant to give forward (as well as give back) and make a difference. And it is from that mindset they will find the means to get it done. You don’t have to start with a great deal of wealth or power to ‘leave a legacy.’ You just have to care about something and decide to act on it. Money can be raised to support something worthwhile.

What would you throw yourself into, whole-heartedly, that would be a joy to promote and even raise funds for if you had to because it did so much good and made you feel incredible?

And The Winner Is …

As we venture into the new year 2010, various media provide us with run-downs, top 10′s, count-downs, etc. of the most notable events of the past year.  My favorite was contained in an electronic greeting card I received from Kate Klaus Kelly, a delightful virtual assistant I’ve had the pleasure to work with this past year.  Here’s the link:  http://www.americangreetings.com/ecards/view.pd?i=505648072&m=9050&rr=y&source=ag999 

In fact, Kate is the overall winner this past year in the greeting card category, getting all three major year end events spot on in my book (Christmas, my birthday and the New Year greeting) – timely, and in absolutely hilarious form, each one.  They were so fun, I just had to share them all.  (Didn’t know American Greetings had it in ‘em …!!)  Here are the other two  for you to enjoy as well:

My birthday greeting : http://www.americangreetings.com/ecards/view.pd?i=504979802&m=9050&rr=y&source=ag999

Christmas (the best by far):  http://www.americangreetings.com/ecards/view.pd?i=504563311&m=9050&rr=y&source=ag999 

Wish you had been so cleverly funny, too, don’t you?  (THANKS KATE!)

May you all have a meaningfully fulfilled and – especially – an incredibly enjoyable new year!

In 2010 – On Enrichment and Being Rich

There’s a great new, free, ebook circulating on the web.  And if you haven’t seen it yet, get a copy and peruse it here at year end as you think about what you want to create in your life and work in the coming months and years … and how you intend to approach that. 

It’s called What Matters Now – download it as a pdf from Seth Godin’s blog.  Turns out what matters now, is what has always mattered really.  It’s like re-discovering an old classic, finding that old, soft ,warm, cozy sweater you thought you’d lost. 

My favorite line of advice? This:   You are only as rich as the enrichment you bring to the world around you.  So, if being richer is important to you, how will you go about bringing more enrichment to the world?  A good question to ponder as we close out this calendar year and, as we do at “new year” – consider fresh beginnings.

It’s Good For You

Research shows that approaching life from a spirit of giving and focus on making a contribution has positive health impacts including improved life-satisfaction, physical and mental health and even living longer. A great legacy created by Sir John Marks Templeton serves to demonstrate – and perpetuate – these benefits.

The name makes him sound like British royalty, and he was created a Knights Bachelor in 1987 for his philanthropic efforts. He was born in the state of Tennessee in the U.S., but lived most of his life in the Bahamas, and is probably best known as the Chartered Financial Analyst who became a billionaire by pioneering the use of globally diversified mutual funds – through his now numerous Templeton Funds for investors.

Beyond his work, however, Templeton’s great interest was in spirituality, and he built a great legacy based on it. In 1972, he established the Templeton Prize to honor individuals who make “an exceptional contribution to affirming life’s spiritual dimension, whether through insight, discovery, or practical works” as stated on the organization’s website. He called recipients “entrepreneurs of the spirit,” and the first prize was given in 1973 to Mother Teresa of Calcutta, who received $85,000 for her charities. Based on sound management, the prize has grown to around $1.6 million annually.

To administer the prize, in 1987 Templeton established the John Templeton Foundation. It now awards around sixty million dollars every year to institutions and people for spiritual and scientific activities that explore values such as the nature of love, gratitude, forgiveness, and creativity – in an effort to reconcile science and religion without diminishing either. The Foundation made the prize and other grant-making activities sustainable, and though Templeton passed from this earth in 2008, his legacy is still very much alive.

In 2001, the Institute for Research on Unlimited Love was founded with a grant from the foundation. It studies unselfish love and the benefits of giving back. The institute’s most recent report “It’s Good to be Good 2009: Health and the Generous Heart” is available on the site. The report details that developing a generous way of being and then doing or giving from that state indeed has benefits for the giver.

I mention Templeton not to emphasize what someone with billions can do – most people readily get that, but think they cannot do something similar. Maybe not at the same scale, but you can do something that will be as important for the recipient of your efforts.

Rather, I provide this example to show how one person, during his lifetime, used his career and his wealth to really address the things he was passionate about. I also provide the example to demonstrate that there are funds available for all kinds of great projects to benefit people and the planet. Creating legacy is not just about disseminating wealth, but about your authentic interest and willingness to act from there. That’s the foundation from which all great legacies are built.

Heart 2.0 In An Era of Greater Chaos

Some time ago, we entered a new era of “accelerating acceleration.” It is an era that allows humans to provide a higher standard of living for everyone on the planet than ever before. It is also a time when things are being shaken up for purposes of being reordered – a time of greater chaos. It’s happening on a global stage: witness the world economy which isn’t so much of a disaster as it is a revelation of what’s real, and what wasn’t working. That gives us clear indications of what needs to be done differently.

This shake up is also happening on an individual basis. Considering that the world stage is too big for any one of us to handle, the question becomes what to focus on and what to do.

This brings us to the topic of stress. I want to address this topic because I see around me lately much greater incidence of its effects – in the forms of injuries, illnesses and ‘accidents.’ (I’m one who doesn’t believe in accidents or coincidences – things happen for reasons, which we can look for, examine and utilize to make progress in life). Just staying in focus, let alone making changes, doing things differently or taking new directions, requires mastery of stress and coping resources.

I have made requests of countless people lately to turn off the “news.” When it actually is new, it gets repeated over and over so you don’t get much more than the initial sound bite. And any good news immediately gets turned into all the bad things that could have happened instead or related disasters around the world or throughout history. Check the top of the hour report on the radio once or twice a day, scan the newspaper or watch a few minutes of television news if you must, but by all means don’t leave the TV or radio on all day on one of those all-news channels that rarely if ever has anything to say about the good in the world or what went right today.

If the stress of your own personal situation is not enough, taking on all the negativity that is being spewed out on the public airwaves can be damaging mojo. “They” say it makes people feel better to know that things are worse off somewhere else. I don’t know about you, but hearing about others’ misfortunes has never made me feel better. And in this energetic universe, it is difficult to avoid being adversely affected by the mere daily transmission of it all, whether you put your focus on it or not.

What seems to be resulting from all this negative noise, is that I see people literally tripping over their own good sense. People around me have injured joints, suffered house fires, scratched their eyes, gotten serious head colds, experienced back or arm pain. I recently checked on someone I know well and inquired how she was doing. “Great,” she told me. “Good,” I said. “Keep it that way. Take good care of yourself,” explaining that I saw the current negative atmosphere really having an impact on people.

The next morning I got an email from her telling me that overnight she had gotten up and fallen over a new barricade she’d erected to segregate a new dog in a particular room in the house. As she told the story she said, “I knew the barrier was there, and as I approached it I said to myself, ‘I should turn on the light switch.’ ” And in the time it took her to override that thought, she took her next step and landed on the floor – with a knee and rib injuries (fortunately no fractures)!

It’s time to slow down. As in mountain climbing, keep moving, but make sure you have a good foothold before you take the next step. In response to the pressure of negativity, too many of us are stepping forward too quickly on shaky ground.

I’ve written a longer article, called The Science of Performance, on the physiological effects of stress and the related subjects of emotional and heart intelligence. Understanding those effects, and mastering multiple intelligences as coping resources can be incredibly helpful. You can develop support that allows you to keep going despite the stressors in your life. You can access that article here.

In addition, there are other practices that can be helpful:

1. HALT. That’s right, just stop. Take a deep breath and notice where your feet are (that’s where you are). Right here, right now, not in the past or in the future, but in this moment. Now scan for the basics of how you’re doing. Are you hungry, angry, lonely or tired? Attend to those basics – whatever else you’re doing can likely wait (and may be adversely impacted if you continue with it in one of those states).

2. Identify Your Needs And Get Them Met. Beyond the basics, we all have other needs, whether we want to admit having them or not, and our needs are different from those of others. Often, they are things left from childhood that we somehow never got enough of. As adults, it’s our job to identify and fully address them. They are the potholes on the road of life: when filled, the road is a lot smoother.

3. Get Complete With Your Past. If you have unresolved issues from the past, they may continue to control or direct your present choices and patterns you create in the future. Identify them and get them handled. Work with an appropriate therapist if need be. Yeah, looking at this stuff may be a pain, but you’ll feel and be better for it. It’s time to get over it and feel strong.

4. Say “No.” A rule I like a lot: if it’s not a “definite yes,” it’s a no. If you can’t say no, practice saying nothing at first – to keep you from saying yes and getting involved in something before you have a chance to think about it. Find ways to avoid saying yes, like “Thanks for the opportunity, but I’ll need to check my schedule and get back with you” that buy you time to follow up and say no. That way you don’t spend your precious life energy on something you are not really jazzed about.

5. Design 10 Daily, Delicious Habits that are good for you and do them every day. They can be as simple as playing soothing music on your way to work, or taking an afternoon tea break to put your feet up. Make them easy and delightful so you want to do them. Do them every day, so if you have to miss a day, you pick up the next day. Okay, I hear you, if you cannot come up with 10, then do 5!

6. Stop Tolerating and Complete Incompletions. Just “putting up with” steals your life energy. Having unfinished business or projects does, too. It’s like having a hole in your cup of life: the universe can be pouring its abundance into your cup, but the holes created by tolerations and incompletions will allow it to drain out so your cup is never full … let alone overflowing. Don’t you want to be someone who can truly say “my cup runneth over” with things you feel good about?

7. Simplify Your Life. Use the 4,000 year old art of Feng Shui rule of thumb: if it’s not beautiful or useful, put it back out into circulation so someone for whom it will be beautiful or useful can find it. Clear out your space. Clutter has energy (like a toleration or incompletion) and robs you of yours. Spend less (better yet, no) time with toxic people. How do you know if they are toxic for you? Do you feel uncomfortable or uneasy around them? That’s an initial clue for you to look deeper at whether you want to spend time with them; limit it if you think you must. No need to explain it to them, just take care of you. Limit the number or length of extra activities, too, so you get enough rest and rejuvenation time.

8. Decide what’s “enough.” What makes each of us feel abundant and powerful is different. More isn’t necessarily better, it can add considerable burdens. Identify what’s really important to you. Do you really need “that” (is it a definite yes!?) or will it just turn to a form of clutter or something you have to clear out at some point? Mass market advertising that’s not really service minded or seeking to add real value (rather that merely seeks to part you from your money) will try to persuade you that you need things you don’t or that if others have it you should, too. Recognize that brainwashing for what it is and drown it out.

9. Create a Daily Ritual to Connect to the Universe. Practice stillness. Create your own rituals for self-renewal. Visualize your day the way you want it to be. Journal about it. Connect with the concept of something greater than yourself and your immediate situation – it is a vast universe full of amazing resources. Read something enlightening. Talk with the power you conceive God to be, if you have such a relationship, in positive terms. Make a list of what you’re grateful for. Light a candle and say a prayer – the easiest and shortest one may just be “thank you.” Ask for guidance and a sign to know it’s been given to you. Create a special ritual for yourself to practice everyday, to support you in remembering what’s important for you to get the most out of each day.

10. Get to Know Your Heart. Your heart has its own independent intelligence, even if your brain (and many institutes of higher learning) try to convince you that logic and rational/linear thinking are the only relevant ways to make decisions. Where do you think creativity, innovation and intuition come from? Okay, maybe the too-little-exercised right side of your brain, but remember that the brain is not totally in control. Yes, it sends impulses to the heart, but the heart doesn’t always respond – and the heart independently communicates with the rest of the body and even electromagnetically outside your body for several feet. 

You can learn more about all this at the website of a great organization called HeartMath. I particularly recommend reading about the Resonant Heart there.  Learn their “Freeze-Frame®” technique – a simple 5 step process that can be done in as little as a few minutes – in a fascinating book called The HeartMath Solution.

Learning to focus on your heart intelligence may produce results that seem coincidental, but are really important information you received because you were open to it. Synchronicity, serendipity and synergy are real forces even if they don’t have a logical explanation. This focus is a definite upgrade to Heart 2.0 – an operating system that does much more than pump blood.

Listen to your heart, and take good care of you while you explore your uniqueness and discover the important work that you came to earth to do. Come out of the chaotic shake-up ready to do the right things for the right reasons. That may well be the real reason you’re here in the first place.